I finally did another review!

It has been a little while, but I finally got another review cranked out. This was my first time actually including links in my review, and it looks like it turned out okay from the page that shows it has been submitted.

I keep thinking I should be writing more reviews. I used to do 1-3 everyday there for a few weeks. I still have 17 toys I could review, but just have been too lazy to actually sit down and write them. It doesn't help that I know my reviews don't count towards my rank at all. It isn't the main point, but it still kinda bums me out a little.

I have been wanting to place an order to eden for a little while. I really want to find a cooling lube that actually works. I have my eye on one by Kama Sutra, and hope to order it in a few days. I have high hopes for it, since Kama Sutra seems like a pretty good brand. Maybe I'll just end up being disappointed, but heck, it's worth a shot.

I don't have much to say really. I got the first two discs of the Sporanos season 3, and I am itching to watch it. Maybe the girls will go to bed a little early tonight. Anyways, my brain is fried right now, and I will just start rambling.

My review should be up before too long, eden is pretty quick about it most of the time. The toy I reviewed was the Slim by Tantus.

"Worth reading, but not usefull"

If you frequent the website named EdenFantasys, then you probably already know what this post is about, solely from the title. The way reviews are ranked really bugs me. Okay, it's not really the ranking system that I don't like, it's the people who rank reviews really low without giving a reason or suggestion. I have written reviews that outlined every aspect of the product, but received "not useful at all" votes. I tend to have one extremely poor vote on each review I've done. It is pretty obvious that there is someone who doesn't like me. I am not egotistical, but I can tell a good review from a crap review, and my reviews are not crap. There have been typos, but I've not ran across a reviewer so far that has not had at least one typo.

I shouldn't worry about it, and generally I don't, but lately it's been getting under my skin. If someone has a personal problem with me (not sure how they would when they don't know me) why would they vote based off of that, and not the quality and usefulness of the review?

I've wondered if it has something to do with how "main stream" I am. I don't mean that I am "normal" because that is such an over rated word that basically means nothing to me. I am not particularly that interesting in the facts that I am heterosexual, married, white, female, and a stay at home mother of two. I don't have a dangerous life, nor am I discriminated against daily, although believe it or not, that does happen to white, straight, people too.

What reason could this person have for rating me so low? Is it because my reviews don't resemble erotica? Or maybe it's because I left a suggestion on one of their reviews, and it pissed that person off? Maybe it has something to do with my being straight and monogamous. Who knows. I've noticed this happening on some of the other people's reviews as well. Maybe I am resented because within a couple months I moved into the top 5 reviewers on the site, as far as rank is concerned anyways. I know there are a few reviewers whom have differing ideas than me...but so what? That's life in a nutshell.

It is a little bit discouraging that as soon as I submit a review, I already know it will get at least one very low ranking. It annoys me that no matter how the review turns out, I will always get those rankings. If someone is going to rank my review poorly, then I feel they should give a reason. What is so wrong with leaving a comment saying "your review would be more useful if..." Would that be so hard? The only reason to not leave a reason would be if there was none. My reviews aren't perfect, but I do take them seriously.

The whole thing with reviewer rank really got under my skin. It still bothers me a little bit, but I felt it never should have been a big deal. I was warned that I would be resented for moving up the ranks so fast...and that person was right. I had extra money at the time, and ordered a lot of toys that I wanted to try. I wrote reviews for them...GASP!!!!! My rank moved up because of it...shame on me. Seriously...why would it even matter? It shouldn't matter. I know there was a lot of resentment because I hadn't done any verified reviews. I didn't see anything wrong with writing reviews on toys I had purchased, and I still don't. Why would Eden give points towards rank for unverified reviews if they didn't want people writing them? I actually bought some toys and some lubes that didn't have any reviews for them. Those reviews were worth less just because I paid my own money for them instead of getting them for free?

I didn't join the program for the free toys, or for the coupons, or for rank. I joined the review program because I was excited about writing the reviews. I've learned a lot, and I've really broadened my horizons and experience with toys. A reviewer I've talked with through email, made it clear that she wanted a high rank in case Eden gave out coupons based off of rank. I don't see why the program should be tailored towards people who rarely participate just so they can get more free toys. It seems a little petty to me, but whatever. I had been under the impression that the review program was in place to serve the shoppers and to lure them to the site. Heck, I came in for the reviews and I stayed because of the review program and the great community. They are building a customer base, it makes perfect business sense. The site doesn't exist solely to give us free toys. I felt that the reviewer program has a ranking as a thank you to the reviewers, plus it adds some incentive for those that want it. Some people can look at it as a competition, that's fine. I don't really see it that way, and that's fine too. Some of the reviewers I respect and trust the most, are NOT in the top five. I don't think I am better than them, and I often comment that I like their reviews. I used to think the people in the top 5 were the "best" on the site, now I realize that they are the people who have the most reviews, and who write reviews frequently. My list of the top five reviewers on the site isn't the same as eden's top five.

It is all a little irritating, but in the end doesn't really matter. I still enjoy writing the reviews and being a part of the community. It will probably stay that way for as long as the site is operating.

Just random crap

I feel more like writing now than I did earlier...not sure why though. One thought is that my husband is trying to scare me about the finances. His job is going kinda slow (total understatement) and we are pretty well broke. He lost his phone yesterday, so he asked me to call it, which I did. Well, he had it up on the top shelf in the linen closet in the bathroom (who knows why) and it vibrated off the ledge. Needless to say, the thing is broken beyond repair. It might have fared better if he hadn't previously dropped it down the stairs, or on the side walk who knows how many times. Anyways, the screen went white and taking out the battery and putting it back in didn't help at all. The people at Verizon Wireless basically told him it is garbage (we already knew that). He used to get a discount at Verizon because his previous job had tie-ins to them that I never really understood. Our 6% discount is gone now and our contract with them is up as of October 1st. We heard they are merging with Alltel, but any contract you have you are stuck in, even if they change things after the fact.

So today my husband went to one of the many Alltel stores here, and bought two phones and a plan that allows us 10 my circle numbers, and unlimited text to each other. I'm not sure of all the details, because hubby did the shopping without me. I'll learn more about it and get my new phone tonight. He picked up the LG Scoop for both of us, slate for him turquoise for me. I kinda like the orange one more though, so I may send him back this evening for an exchange.

I hope it isn't too bulky, as I don't carry a purse...EVER. I am not one of those moms you see with a hand bag that looks like luggage with everything besides the kitchen sink in it. My phone goes in my right front jeans pocket, my keys in the left, my money and ID in my back right pocket. If I have any lipstick or other things I need to take with me, then my husband is responsible for carrying them. I don't take extra crap with me when I go out with friends, and I don't want to carry an extra bag just because it looks "hip."

My current phone is the MotorKrzr...it sucks. Don't buy that phone!!! I originally got it because it is fairly thin and sexy as hell. Too bad it's a piece of steaming poo. My first phone like this (when they first came out with it) went through major screen issues, and had a thing for turning off at the most inopportune times. We took it into the store, and they said it had gotten wet. I left it on the vanity while I took a shower...big whoop. My previous LG phone had survived taking a dip in a glass of iced tea...twice. I didn't do it in case you are wondering...my daughter was about 2 at the time, and had an obsession with putting things into glasses that were full of liquid. Anyways, since I had only had it a short while, they gave us half off on a phone exactly like it ("No thanks, I'll never actually NEED a warranty, why would I?" Doh!!) The new phone did exactly what the previous one had. They again told us that it was ruined by moisture, until we told them to look at the damn moisture indicator, and guess what...it was still WHITE! No moisture, just a crappy phone. They updated the software, and told us that would fix it. It got better for awhile, until the battery started acting weird. By weird I mean the phone says it is fully charged, then 5 minutes into a conversation it says the battery is low...whoops! It just shut off!! I have been putting up with this crappy thing for awhile now, so I am glad to be getting a new phone. I think this "MotoCrpr" may meet "Mr. hammer" when all is said and done.

I wasn't anticipating the cost of new phones, and it is really going to bite into our budget. It will be cheaper per month than our old contract with VW, but the phones were $200. We will have a mail-in-rebate, so we will be getting that $200 back...in the freakin' next year or so. I HATE mail-in-rebates because IF you get the money back, it takes (in my experience) 3-8 months!! Anyways, it will be nice to have the whole deal over with.

Just to stress me out more, my husband told me today that all the prices in the store are going up, and the up front cost of special order furniture is going from 25% to 50%. It will be a lot harder to sell to people because of it, plus people aren't buying as much because of the shitty ass economy. Maybe he'll be job hunting again soon :( Bleh...as long as the mortgage and utilities are paid, right? No more toy buying for me for awhile...seriously, that part really bugs me. The not shopping and the cutting back of eating out and such doesn't bother me at all, but no more new toys!!!!! Thank goodness for Eden's review program. I have some pretty cool toys now anyways, and they are satisfying enough. Maybe this is a good thing...perhaps I was getting a little addicted.

Speaking of toys...the new one came today. It is actually a lot cooler than I was expecting. It is a small clit vibe, super soft TPR material, fairly strong, and fairly quiet. Too bad it uses watch batteries, or else I would absolutely love it. It is about the length of my finger, but the shape reminds me of a swirl cone. The baby blue is adorable too...even though that puts me in mind of a baby teether. It is supposed to be water proof, so I'll have to use it in the tub to test it...dang ;)

More random crap here, I'm thinking about the phone again. My husband just sent me a text, shame on him as it is free for the Alltel contract, but for VW they will charge me 10 cents for every incoming and outgoing txt!! He has already cost us 20 cents by sending a stupid text that I had to reply to. "Loving my new phone?" Yes, that is what he sent me. Was it a question asking if I am loving his new phone...is he trying to make me jealous? Or perhaps it was supposed to be "Loving my new phone!" I am thinking that one, since that would make a hell of a lot more sense. Maybe he is just confused...I know I am.

I don't think I will like the blue phone. I don't particularly like blue for me. I think blue is pretty, but not on me, not even a phone. I have pale (ghostly white actually) skin and dark brown/black hair...blue doesn't look good on me. I think I will make him drive his ass back to the store and pick up the orange one. Well okay, I'll have him pick it up on his way home from work. It wouldn't be nice to make him make an extra trip for it.

Okay, there went 20 more cents! Gotta love being txt'd to death :(

Ohhh, netflix in the mail! 3 Star Trek Next Generations, Rurouni Kenshin, and Ah! My Goddess.

One last random thought...I swear ;) I wish Eden would send the cost of the toy along when they send out toys new to the site. That Elastomer cactus toy I reviewed recently...I was shocked that it was above $25, and it would have made a good difference in my opinion of it's over all value if I had known that BEFORE I wrote the review. At least I could have mentioned it. Thank goodness for follow up reviews and comments. I think it would just be helpful if a little sticky note on the product packaging listed either the price or the price range. I've seen sticky notes listing product material before, so why not price? If I reviewed a toy that I thought deserved a price of $30, but the actual price was $15, or course I'd want to mention that in the review. Same goes for thinking a toy is around the $25 mark then finding out later that it is actually $43 as was the case with the Bonsai Joy toy.

Okay, so I lied about no more random crap. And speaking of crap...we bought new curtains last night! Yep, they are brown curtains...hence the crap comment. Not sure they look so good with the red walls, but they will look awesome with the sage green walls...once I get my lazy ass around to painting the living room. We are broke right? New curtains don't make sense...well they do if your furnace is over 50 years old and you buy thermal curtains. We are going to be freezing this winter, and paying out the ass for it. Last winter our gas bill averaged from $160 to $200 each month, not to mention the $80 in electricity bills each month. The furnace needs to be replaced, but we can't afford it right now or else we would get it done before winter hits big time. Our estimated gas bill this winter should average around $230 each month, and that's according to the gas company so it will probably be closer to $250 or even $300 per month.

Anyways, the new curtains are making a big difference already. The living room is staying warmer during the night, and they look nice too. I almost can't tell they are Walmart curtains. I only got 2 panels and they were $20 per panel. Later on I'd like to get 2 more panels, because it really should be 4 wide so they look nicer when closed. I also got small thermal curtains for the bay window, although they are too long. Seriously...this means I will have to dig out the damn sewing machine and hem them up. I wouldn't bother, but they are over 10" too long. Weirdly enough the shortest thermal curtains they had there were 63" long, and I needed 52." At some point we'll need to seal the girl's bedroom windows with plastic from the outside.

The oldest girl doesn't have curtains in her room, because she recently ripped the rod down. I don't feel like putting something else up just for her to destroy it. I guess at least she can't bust it up into little pieces like she can with blinds. I don't know what to do with her some days :( A talk to the Dr. is in order though as her behavior is out of control. I took her bed away from her because she was chewing it to pieces. She leaned her mattress up against the window sill and was jumping into it so it would fling her back onto the floor. I took that away too, so she spent a night just her bedding. So much for punishment, she thought it was fun to "camp out" in her room. Right now her dresser is in her closet, and we put a flip lock on it up where she can't reach it. She was getting in there and ripping clean clothes off the hangars so she could play with them, not to mention chewing buttons off as well. She has nothing in her room besides her mattress and her bedding.

I don't get what the deal is with that little girl. She has gotten past the terrible twos, and has stopped with the whinny temper tantrums. Now it just seems to be all out destruction mode. It really embarrasses me that she acts this was. I keep telling myself that it's just a phase and it will pass. I'm dealing with it how I have read is best. I take away toys for being naughty (time outs don't affect her at all) and then I give one back if she has behaved better than normal for a whole day. I reward her good deeds with praise, and in special cases with a small treat (little suckers are her favorite). It is just frustrating me beyond belief. I am currently working on getting her to sleep more in case she is grumpy from lack of sleep. She goes to bed at 8 in the evening and gets up at 6 in the morning. She takes a 2 hour nap in the after noon as well. I am thinking about skipping the nap, and putting her to bed at 6 at night instead. Kids her age are supposed to get around 12 hours of sleep, so it is at least worth a shot to try some adjusting. I just pray she doesn't get worse.

Okay, I just caught her stacking up toys as high as she could then putting her mattress on it like a ramp. No mattress tonight either. I am so frustrated with her. Reason does nothing for dealing with her, punishment doesn't seem to do anything either, and I think the whole, reward the positive ignore the bad is a load of crap. I don't think the people who write this crap even have kids, or at least not ones that can think. I don't understand why she does some of this stuff, but at least I know she is creative and smart. Thank goodness the bathroom has a lock on the door...I think I would have gone crazy by now if I didn't have a minute escape from all the craziness. Why do I want another one? Maybe I should check myself into a mental home, lol Maybe I want another baby because the newborn stage is so nice. They are cuddly then, easy to take care of (granted your baby isn't colicky) and they are so quiet and adorable. I am going to go crazy when my oldest becomes a pre-teen. Ha, it's hard to put up with her attitude at age 3 1/2.

Finally, the Fleshlight review is done!

I finished the Fleshlight review, and it is up on EdenFantasys!!! One thing went terribly wrong with it though. It was late at night when I finished it, and after proof reading it about 5 times I asked hubby to read over it. Well he did, and found one typo. I submitted it in full confidence that it was near perfect...then I saw that huge typo glaring back at me...Instead of Shake 'N Bake, I put Shake 'N Back...talk about embarrassing. I was so pissed at myself and at my husband. Why did I even have him proof read it?! Maybe I wasn't the only one who was tired that night.

Anyways, it up on the site, typos and all. I so wish I could go back and edit it. It diggs and picks at me that I know that typo is there. It is just so annoying, but there's nothing I can do about it now.

Because of it, I am dreading my next review. I need to review a nice little plug, but am putting it off. I've still got a day or two until it needs to be done anyways.

That's all...I'm not in a very writing mood right now. We're broke, I embarrassed myself, what's new? Ha ha, life goes on...

Knitting while I watch Ah! My Goddess?

I am one to favor two kinds of anime, the violent stuff, or the crudely funny stuff. And here I am, watching a romance comedy anime like Ah! My Goddess. What is wrong with me? Seriously, I have no clue. What is worse is that I've actually been enjoying it! I guess I have watched a little bit of Tenchi Muyo, but that was because of Ryoko because I liked her character. Ah! My Goddess is funny at times, and that's what has me watching it. I don't really go for the romance stuff, especially when it comes to anime or tv. I usually just get bored with them. Oh well, right? I might abandon waiting for my husband for watching Bleach. I am about a month behind as the show airs in Japan, and it is bugging the heck out of me. (I would suggest anyone wanting to watch the Japanese Bleach, download it from www.dattebayo.com as their subtitling is excellent and they get the new shows out within a day. You do need a bit torrent client however, and for that I would suggest utorrent. Some people see this as pirating, I however don't consider watching a tv show as pirating. To me it is the same thing as recording a tv show so you can watch it later.) He never has time to watch it though, and I'm not supposed to watch it without him. Maybe I'll follow his personal philosophy of act now, apologize later. I will continue to hold out, and hopefully the next season of the Sopranos comes in the mail from Netflix today.

I like to watch dvds of tv shows and anime while I crochet or knit. I am current working a baby blanket that is experienced level, so I have to pay attention to what I'm doing with it, but for easy patterns I can do it without even looking. The whole purl 1, knit 1, repeat, is pretty easy. The worst thing I've done while knitting and watching tv was to drop a stitch, but I've become pretty good at knitting repairs. That's what happens when you make a lot of mistakes :( My favorite show to watch while knitting or crocheting would have to be Star Trek: the Next Generation. I've seen most of the shows before at one point or another during my childhood. So the shows become more of a reminder or refresher than anything else.

The website is back up now, so I was able to get a link to the baby blanket I am making. I am making it in a different color though. I picked a really light pastel purple for the little girl. I want to make a powder blue one in case I have a baby boy someday. It is such a pretty baby blanket, I was thinking about making one for each of my girls, even though they are too old for baby blankets. I just thought maybe they could have them for their babies someday, if they choose to have children. If that doesn't happen, then they could always just have them for a token from their childhoods. The other project I'm working on is a knit shrug, and I think it is going to be beautiful. I am making it in the "Gothic" color which is a dark purple. The yarn is super soft and easy to work with. I don't have the shrug part done yet, but I've been focusing most of my craft time on the baby blanket. I had wanted to make it in the "Lagoon" color because the woman I am making it for wears a lot of blues and dark blues look really nice on her. I hope she's fine with purple though, as the Lagoon color was sold out in every store I checked. I guess I wasn't the only one who thought it was a beautiful color.

I have stopped taking the Alli pills now. The bottle ran out, and while I think they helped, they didn't help enough to be worth $60 each month. I am back onto using Slim Quick, which I have used in the past. I like it and it seems to help me to take a pill, even if I get a placebo effect from it. I bought one box of the "Cleanse" pills, and one box of the regular Slim Quick. I think after I am done with both boxes I will try the "Extreme" version, since I am doing the P90X workout program. I am hoping the extra energy and being more for hard core exercising would be beneficial to me. Maybe I'm just wasting my money on these diet pills, I don't know. I think I get the most benefit from the pills being a reminder that I need to work hard.

My husband has been trying really hard to derail my diet lately. I don't know why he does it, but he sabotages me when I start getting some real success. My size 10 jeans were starting to get loose on me, and after telling him about it, he has went on this fast food craze. Every night he wants pizza for supper, even if I tell him I can't have him tempting me like that. He hasn't exactly been being very good with the workouts either. He always complains about them and has gotten so bad with it that I've missed a couple days. I don't know what he's afraid of, but it is really pissing me off. If he doesn't want to do the workouts anymore, than at least he could get out of my way and let me do them alone.

I talked to him last night, and he said that he will try to not be so negative about the whole dieting and exercising, but who knows if he will actually be nicer or not. I had originally asked him to do the workouts with me so we could encourage each other, not so he could drag me down like he tends to do. I guess, that's what happens when you have the wicked witch of the west for a mother :P Okay, that wasn't nice, honest, but not nice.

I really need to write that review for the Fleshlight. I am not feeling creative at all, but I need to just buckle down and write it. I have a couple more toys I need to do reviews for as well...don't want to fall behind.

I'm attracted to fat, balding, midle aged men? Seriously?

I realized something strange as I was watching the Sopranos one evening. Tony Soprano is hot! Ever watch the show? Understand why I am a little confused? Is it his physical appearance, or the confidence and power shown through his demeanor? I have come to the conclusion that it is the latter. I am attracted to mafia style characters. The power, the confidence, yes maybe even the violence a little bit. I wouldn't want it in my real life, but the thought of my lover beating the crap out of someone to protect me has its allure. I am also attracted to Italian men, though I think a great majority of women are. The language is sexy and sensual, and there is just something sexy about dark hair and dark eyes. The Italian factor does take a back seat to the attitude though, as I've noticed I'm drawn to men who show the same confidence but lack the dark hair and eyes.

Another show that has confused me is CSI. It is obvious who is supposed to be sexy on there. The two younger men who are ripped and toned beyond belief, but who am I attracted to? Grissom of course. The man in charge, the man with the confidence and the knowledge and weird little hobbies.

Just look at who I married! While he doesn't have the dark hair and dark eyes that I pined for in my teenager days, he does have the fat and balding part down :D lol He thinks his big hard belly bothers me. He thinks I'll be disgusted by him if he becomes bald (thankfully I've stoped pointing out to him how rapidly his "thin patch" is losing it's trees). When I first met him he was fat, and had his hair cut so close he may as well have been bald. Just to clarify I think bald cuts only look good on certain men, it is the balding look that I like. The receding hair line and the thin patch on top. I can't say as I understand this attraction, but I can't deny it's there.

I met my hubby online through an online dating service. After we talked via email, messenger, and phone, for a few months we agreed to met in person. The round hard belly didn't bother me, and no matter how many times I told him that it didn't turn me off, he remained uneasy about me touching it. At least now he understands me a little better and doesn't grimace when I grab his pregnancy-esque tummy that is covered in red hair. There is the massive amount of freckles, the blue eyes, the red hair, the balding, the big belly, and the ugly feet. I know I am weird, but I don't like feet, I never have. He possesses so many features that I swore disgusted me when I was a teen, so how is it that he drives me wild? He is built a little bit like a bull. Thick neck, thick chest, wide shoulders, and an endurance that sometimes amazes me.

To make my husband perfect, I don't think I would change the way he looks. If I could change anything it would be his attitude. Not his personality, just his attitude and level of confidence. He doesn't carry himself with any sense of pride, and I wish he did. He is a smart man who works hard and I think he deserves to have more pride in himself and more confidence. I blame his mother for this, because I don't think he would be like this if she hadn't constantly told him he wasn't good enough when he was growing up. I won't talk about that though, as there is not enough time in the whole world to talk about "her."

Yes there are some things I wish were different about my husband, but over all I think he's a pretty neat guy. He puts up with me after all ;) I can be hard to live with sometimes, as my sense of humor is a little strange. I am the one with the chimney sweep song from Mary Poppins as my ring tone for when my hubby calls, ONLY because it bugs him. He was sorta annoyed at first, but now thinks it's funny. When anyone else calls me, its the Imperial March from Star Wars, lol I know, you wouldn't think the two would go together at all...and they don't :P

This is sort of another note, but I wanted to add that my hubby has gotten much sexier to me after he has started his new job (and I was insanely attracted to him before ;). He has went from wearing ratty jeans and tee's stained with plumbing glue and paint to wearing dress slacks, dress shirt, and a tie. Is that the whole "power" thing again? What ever it is, I like it. This has brought a fetish to light though. Hubby likes me to wear one of his ties while we have sex cowgirl style. I didn't think much of it the first time he asked. It is kinda hot, and I don't mind wearing a man's neck tie, but he has been asking for it a lot lately. lol He could have came up with something weirder though, so I am thankful. I must admit I do look pretty hot with a tie hanging between my busty boobs ;) At least he doesn't ask me to wear his pizza delivery boy hat, lol I would say no to that one.

COMPLETELY off subject here, but I printed out butt loads of free knit and crochet patterns yesterday (in fact we need more ink now). We are still kinda broke, so I am trying to think of cheapish presents that have some meaning to them for XMAS and birthdays this year. I can make gifts for around $15-$50 depending on how large the item is and what kind of yarn it calls for. There is a pattern for a knitted dress I'd like to make for myself, but figured up the cost of the "cashmere blend" yarn and it would be around $150. I could buy a dress cheaper than that, so I won't probably make it for quite a long while. I have picked out yarns though and had hubby pick some up last night on his way home from delivering pizza. I bought enough yarn to make a beautiful blanket for a friend's new baby girl, and yarn for a shrug for a friend for birthday in a couple months. After those are done I'll need to pick up yarn to make a little kitted vest for my nephew who will be turning 2 in a couple months. I don't like most home knitted or crocheted things because they look so cheap, but I've actually been able to find some very nice patterns online that were free. I am a stickler for wanting things to look professional and neat.

I was going to post a link to the baby blanket I will be starting on today, but Coats and Clark's website isn't loading. I'll add a link to it another day though. This pattern is "Experienced" level, so I should be working on it a few days. If I can't get a stupid link, I'll just take a picture of the finished product.

Some new dvds came from netflix today, 2 Sopranos, 2 Star Trek, the next generation, and Whisper of the Heart. I'd better get "busy" ;)

New toys always make me smile :D

The Fleshlight did come! It was fun to play with, though I must say hubby's reaction was a little disappointing at first. I got it all cleaned up and ready for when he got home, so he wouldn't have to mess with it. I was right in guessing that he would want me to use it on him.

I am a little confused as to what exactly he was expecting from it. He spent a lot of time complaining that it wasn't tight enough. I finally had to tell him to stop bitching about it and just relax. He followed my advice and closed his eyes and tried to relax, instead of critiquing how I held the monstrously huge fleshlight. Not surprisingly, he reported that it felt much better when he closed his eyes and just enjoyed the sensations. He has wanted to include it into our lovemaking a couple times since that first run. The favorite use so far is to fold a pillow around it and he can lay on it and use it while he goes down on me. That use alone is worth having one. He likes it enough that he is interested in getting a different sleeve that is either tighter or has some ridges. The "original" sleeve was not as stimulating as either of us had hoped for, so we'll be buying a couple different ones to find a better fit for him. Fleshlight does some sales where it's buy two sleeves get a third one free, so I will most likely order from them next time instead of EdenFantasys. I would like to get a couple for him, so he has some variety.

We are still doing some product "research" so it will be a day or two until I get the review out. I always feel a little strange reviewing male specific toys, because of course I am not a man. It is a longer process than if it's just a toy for my use only. My hubby isn't much for writing, and has trouble articulating feelings and sensations to me. It is usually kind of like an interview, and occasionally it turns into an interrogation and we have to get out the flogger, but that's a whole other story ;) I can't just ask him to describe it to me I have to ask "does it feel more like *whatever* or does it feel like *whatever, whatever* ?" After about 20 "no's" he'll say, "maybe more like the first thing you said, and some of that last thing." Weirdly enough, as I was using it on him, he kept asking me if I liked it. I finally just started saying that it was sooo sexy and I loved using it on him every minute or so. I am guessing that's what he was looking for, given the look of utter egotistical satisfaction across his face. Wish he would have just said "I'd like you to tell me how sexy it is." Sometimes he really confuses me, but hey, life would be boring without it ;)

I'll be getting a new toy today, yay! I am not sure what it is exactly. When I first learned I'd be getting it I went to the site to find out more about it, well it just showed up under dvd's and it's called "Bonsai." An internet search lead me to this. Lol, needless to say I was a little bit taken aback. I was like, "whoa, that's pretty weird. Guess it will be interesting to review a porn, since I've never done that before." I was a bit wary of the whole "Asian Bush" fetish going on. I told my hubby about it, and he was excited about it! Honestly I was surprised, as he is into big boobs and "bare down there." I really don't like ethnicity as a fetish, as color of skin shouldn't be considered a fetish as far as I'm concerned. Heck, I'm white and I find it offensive, I can't imagine how black or asian people feel about it.

Anyways, back to what I was talking about...hubby gets weird with porn. The rule in our house is that we only watch porn together, since he doesn't like me watching it without him, and I don't like him using all his sex drive up without me, so the rule only made sense to both of us. He is always majorly excited to watch porn together, until it actually starts...then come the comments. "wow, this is stupid. She isn't very hot. Ewww, that's gross, why would anybody enjoy that?" It usually goes on like that for about five minutes until I've had enough of it, I ask him if he just wants to turn it off...and of course he doesn't. lol I have come to believe that he really likes it, but doesn't want me to know that he does. If he can tell that I am enjoying it, he insists we turn it off and just go get busy without it. Needless to say, we don't watch porn much, as it usually only ends up lasting for about 5 minutes until we abandon it.

Yesterday I went to see if anything new about the toy had been put up onto the site, and it is now listed as a G-spot toy! I told my hubby, and he was visually disappointed (again, I wish he would make up his mind about porn so we can either not bother or else enjoy it). Anyways, I'm a little bit worried about what this toy is going to look like. Bonsai? Like a tree? I had hoped that it was a wooden toy, but it says it vibrates, so it's not likely. I have this image in my head of a woman (not me, as my imagination is not that self-torturous) trying to use a bonsai tree as a sex toy. I have NO idea what to expect! I am hoping for the best, and expecting the worst.

Waaaaay off topic here, but I fit into my pre-second baby jeans yesterday! They are junior's sizes and I don't understand the sizing as compared to ladies'. These are size 13, and they are a little smaller than my ladies' size 10 jeans. I am guessing they are near in size to what 9's would be, if I could find size 9 anywhere I would compare, though I am under the impression no such thing exists. I am NOT down to size 8 jeans yet, and I know I wouldn't be able to get my butt into a pair even if I tried. A few weeks ago I tried putting on a pair of my jeans from in between children, and I actually ripped the butt where the belt loop was sewn down. lol I won't try so hard next time :) It seems like there weren't any ladies jeans in the styles that I like (and fit me) back then. It was only 3 years ago, but it seems like ladies jeans include more than just "mom jeans" now. I may be a mother, but I am only 24 for pete's sake! Actually I doubt I'll want to wear the jeans, with tapered legs and a waist that sits under my boobs, no matter what age I reach. I have really been diggin' the Levi's that are boot cut with a mid-raise waist. They aren't too high, but my ass crack doesn't show either, and boot cut is the only style of jeans I will allow on my body.

So totally into rambling there. I should go put the netflix dvd's out before the mailman comes. When I pay the same amount no matter how long I keep the movies, I feel like I have to watch them and get them back out in the mail as fast as I possibly can. lol I know that defeats the purpose or the whole "no late fees" thing, but seriously, I don't want to just thrown my money at them for nothing!

Awaiting the torch

How long until I become flamed? Not sure. Do I care? Nope...why should I? I am of course talking about the recent post I made on edenfantasys regarding the reviewer ranking change. Well, it wasn't so much about the change as it was about the conduct of one reviewer. What should have been a place for friendly discussion and useful feedback for the site turned into a vicious argument with one person dominating all posts by others. It has been bothering ever since this person chimed in with responses accusing the system of being unfair and being only a "popularity contest."

The original goal has been lost. The ranking system was to change to better suit the reviewers contributing to the program. It has since changed into being an avenue for one person to get what they want, and be damned if you don't agree. It pisses me off to see so many people making suggestions that are pertinent only to have one person argue their suggestion into oblivion until the others feel there is no point in posting their thoughts and comments. It appals me that eden is trying so hard to conform to what a small handful of people want. Is the majority getting left out in the cold to satisfy the few? The community has already started to die; I can't be the only one who is concerned about this? What will happen when activity on the site no longer holds any meaning? I can see people being upset because others have more time to devote to commenting, but isn't that essentially the same as holding a grudge against the neighbor because they can afford a newer car? Wasn't a cap on number of reviews put into place because one person had more time and money available than others did? Wasn't that cap put into place because the others were upset that this one person had an "unfair" advantage? I don't see what's so unfair about someone having more "stuff" than someone else does. I am grateful for all the time and effort that went into those reviews. I have avoided some bad toys because that person has more time and money than I do. Why all the bitterness? I just don't get how someone could feel so much resentment over something that happens in everyday life.

I have went into the forums and read the posts many times. I always go in hoping that the argumentativeness has died down, only to find that it is still there. I see people not bothering to post anymore. I end up typing up a post about how every one's feedback is important, then I remember that anything I post will be discredited by that person. I just cancel out and close the browser. I am left disgusted and disappointed.

Today I finally clicked on the "Post" button. It was an insanely long post, but I had a lot to say. It came out a lot harsher than I wanted it to, but it needed to be said. I see people who felt strongly about the issue backing down and not bothering to state their opinions anymore, and it pisses me off. There is a strong sense of community, and I hate seeing that ripped apart. Why should many be alienated for one? If no one else will stand up and tell this person to chill out, then I must. I don't see much motivating for all the bickering other than a power struggle. I feel that most of the people in the reviewer community are friends. Not close friends of course, but I still feel that my respect and trust is well placed in them. I hold respect for the person whom is taking charge and trying to make it all about her. I have enjoyed her reviews, and I feel she is a very welcome part of the program. I do not understand the resentment and bitterness that is coming out though...it just feels so misplaced and judgemental. What is wrong with people disagreeing? Just because we hold different views does not mean that one of us is "right" and the other "wrong."

I am not holding my breath for the flaming that is to come. I expect it, given all the haughtiness that has been present during the discussions. There is too much bitterness for anger to not also be present. I am done talking and thinking about this for now. I have other things to occupy my mind with.

Still on the subject of Edenfantasys, I should be getting my next assignment toy today. I had requested a Fleshlight for my hubby. I am pretty excited about it actually. I doubt my husband will ever use it without me, as his sex drive is usually pretty low. I initiate the sex almost 100% of the time. Last night he didn't want to have sex, but we hadn't been together sexually the day before either. I just waited until he was asleep then worked on him a bit. Doesn't take much to make a sleeping man horny :) Anyways, he woke up with a much different attitude than he fell asleep with. I was kind and didn't make him do anything, heck that's what the Hitachi is for!

I got off track there :( The Fleshlight we are getting is the non-descript one in "ice" with the original sleeve. The Fleshlight website is kind of a cool place actually. It really annoys me that the women for the presentation have such a "porn star" attitude. It actually makes me sick to hear and see the super fakey tell tale signs of a porn actor. The is a good number of different sleeves that I didn't know about previously. If my husband likes the original sleeve, then I may buy him one of the "fancier" ones for Christmas. I am not worried about a masturbator replacing me at all. Hubby prefers vaginal intercourse to everything else anyway. I've heard that men prefer anal sex because it is so much tighter and more pleasurable than vaginal sex. Hubby told me that was stupid. He doesn't think anal could ever be better than vaginal sex. He told me my cunt was almost too tight for him...but I think he said that just to make me happy.

I have not been using the Kegelscisor much lately. I thought it would be great to have stronger muscles down there, but hubby asked me to stop after the first week. I don't seem to grip and pull in with my muscles, instead it is more of a pushing. I am not usually aware of it during sex until I push him out and he gets pissed. I've tried explaining to him that I don't do it on purpose, it is just my body's response to the pleasure he is giving me. He doesn't get as upset over it now because I told him that, but it still irritates him to be pushed out. It seems weird to me that he says I am really tight and strong, when my previous lover told me I was sloppy and loose. Maybe it's all the sex that has made me stronger and more toned down there :P Either way, I don't want to get to the point where I break his dick during sex.

The Kegelscisor sits neatly in it's padded box, tempting me to use it. I have the smart balls too, but not much worry about them making me stronger as they don't seem to do much. I actually have found that they are not that great at staying in place. They stay in great until I start to get aroused. My muscles loosen up and get ready for penetration, which is not conducting to holding something inside. Then after the first bit of arousal is over with, my muscles start working and trying to push the damn things out. I'm not sure if many women have that problem, as I am constantly reading how well they stay in place. I just seem to do the pushing as apposed to the pulling with my pc muscles. It has come to mind if it is possible for a woman's pc muscles to become so strong as to actually break a penis. Wouldn't that be a surprise for a rapist?! Not saying that I will develop my muscles then try to get raped for that purpose. It was just a random thought. I shared the thought with my hubby, and I maybe shouldn't have. Lol he got that very worried look in his face like it was my goal to try and break his dick.

Speaking of muscle strength, I've been doing good with the workouts. I took a couple days off from it because I had been so sick, but it didn't seem to slow down my progress much. I feel much stronger than I did when we first started the program. I am finally under 200 lbs now too. I weighed in at 199.5 lbs this morning. It doesn't seem like a whole lot to lose, but it feels like a lot off of my body. I am going to have to do something with my wedding ring, as it is nearly impossible to keep it on my ring finger. I started wearing it on my index finger and hubby freaked out. He suggested I get a chain and wear it around my neck instead, but I don't generally wear necklaces. I may do that though, as I don't want to not wear it at all. I was down to 199.5 lbs at one point before, but ballooned back up to 210 after a couple months of junk food and no exercise. Really bites that it took so much hard work to get those stupid 10 pounds off again.

I am lazy today, so sorry no links. I doubt I come back and add them in later either. Today has been a more restful day. Yesterday I steam cleaned the carpets, washed all 8 loads of laundry, worked on patching walls in the stairwell, painted cabinets, cleaned up the cat's area in the basement, rearranged the girls' bedrooms, and other menial tasks like straighting up and doing dishes besides taking care of the girls. It was a long hard day, so today is my day is sit on my ass and knit while sipping on coffee spiked with coconut rum...yummy :)

Calling in sick

Yes, I have been sick. My hubby was so nice as to bring home germs to me, and I've spent the past couple days with a lovely head cold. I haven't been on the Internet much lately because of it. I doubt I'll even get on the computer today besides to write this.

Hubby stayed home from work yesterday to help take care of the girls so I could rest. Yesterday was pizza delivering, NOT working selling furniture. If he would have worked at his new job yesterday, it wouldn't matter if I was dying, he wouldn't have stayed home with me.

My oldest daughter ought to be getting home from preschool soon. The school was supposed to be good for her, it was supposed to help her get past her speaking difficulties. The only thing she has learned from school so far is to give up in the face of moderate difficulty. I hate hearing the words "I can't mommy" coming from her mouth. She never said "I can't" before she went to preschool. She used to ask for help, or tell me that something was frustrating, but she never just flat out gave up. I must say that I haven't been that impressed at her "learning" anything from school. Her speech improved more over the summer break than it had while she was in school. The only reason I still have her going is because she enjoys it so much and she is learning social behavior and how to make friends and get along with other children her own age.

It is frustrating to have a child who is behind in something. My daughter doesn't have anything serious, just slow speech development. She is smart (of course every parent says that of their children) but she has a lot of trouble forming words. Some letters are impossible for her to form at this point, no matter how hard she tries she just can't do it yet. She has gotten to the point other people can understand her sometimes, as opposed to others not being able to understand anything she says. It is hard for me to not help her when she is struggling with words. There is a fine line between helping and enabling. If I were to do everything for her, then she would never learn. It is difficult to not be able to fix this for her. Encouraging her and giving her the opportunities to practice is all that I can do for her.

My head hurts too bad, think I'm done on the computer for the day.

Lazy Saturday

It is a Saturday, and I'm really feeling it. The girls have been cranky, I've been tired, and hubby has been at work all day. I've been drinking cup after cup of coffee all day. I can't say that it helps me to not be so tired, but it does taste good. One must consider though that I use Irish Cream in my coffee, so of course it tastes good ;) I may as well just drink the Baily's straight though and save the coffee.

I have been seeing so many P90X commercials on T.V. lately. This morning after hubby and I finished our workout, I switched the T.V. over to the local channels, and there was an infomercial for the workout we just got done doing! I changed the channel and there was another one!

I am really feeling like this is a knitting and crocheting time of year. It is so cold and rainy out when only a couple weeks ago it was bone-dry and hot. My little nephew will be turning 2 in a couple months, and I have been searching online for a good cardigan pattern. I think I finally found one. I found some fun looking ones that I can make for my girls too. At least making things for little kids is a lot faster than making adult sized projects. I have been crocheting lately, and am looking forward to doing a knitting project. I think I'll have hubby stop by the store on the way home and pick up enough yarn for one cardigan pattern I found for my oldest daughter. I will probably do two if the first one turns out good. Pink or red for the nearly 4 year old, and purple or soft blue for the 2 year old. The colors all depend on what Wal-Mart has, as Michael's is too expensive and all the fricken' way across town, and the other craft stores don't stay open this late.

While looking at patterns and yarns, I came across glow in the dark yarn by bernat. Okay, I must say I was pretty surprised, and I am going to just HAVE to make slippers for my girls out of this stuff. I know my nearly 4-year-old, would think it was super cool.

Enough about yarn and crafts before I feel like I should be sitting in a rocking chair with a cat on my lap. I am a member of Netflix, and honestly I am very excited for when I will be able to watch the "instant viewing" movies on the T.V. via Xbox 360. For some stupid reason the computer is playing videos in black and white, and really dark as well. Flash video works fine though. I downloaded the newest episodes of Bleach, and when I went to watch one was pretty pissed that I could barely see it. I'll have to have hubby take a look at it tonight, as I've been far to lazy feeling today to want to fix anything. I have a couple movies from Netflix that I still need to watch, namely Ed Wood (Johnny Depp is an awesome actor in my book, and mighty nice to look at as well;) and Schindler's List which I've been wanting to watch for a couple years now. My favorite movie of all time is the Shawshank Redemption, and several people that liked that told me that I would love Schindler's List. I had watched Castle in the Sky and Princess Mononoke recently, and just sent them back today in fact.

I've been watching Star Trek: The Next Generation, and have been finding it quite amusing. I didn't remember them being so corny from my childhood, so it is a good fun show to watch. My father has most of the original Star Trek on VHS, and I really like watching them as well. It is always funny to me how Spock can get the crap beat out of him and his clothes are just fine. Kirk gets slapped in the face and his shirt tears off. lol It is actually a very provocative show for being made during the 60's, as it seems like William Shatner manages to get naked a lot during the series, not to mention he makes out with virtually every female character on the show. To say the least, it has been fun watching the Next Generation and realizing that those actors really were that young once upon a time. I just returned the 2nd disc of the first season, and am looking forward to the 3rd one coming. It is a show that I can crochet or knit while I watch it.

Hubby watched the video review of Tales of Vesperia with me yesterday. It convinced him we should get that game. I've been wanting another Tales game for awhile, as I really enjoyed Tales of Symphonia for the Game Cube (also playable on the Wii :) I was a little concerned though that the video review didn't say if a human player could control any of the party members during battle though. That was a big draw for us with the Tales of Symphonia game, as it made it fun to be able to play it together.

I loaned Blue Dragon to my brother. It seemed okay at first, but, bleh does it ever get slow quickly. I was really hoping for something better from the man who created Final Fantasy. I have been reluctant to play Lost Odyssey because of how slow and repetitive Blue Dragon felt to me. I hear it is good though, so I will try it eventually. I am really waiting for Fable II and Fallout 3 this fall, so I need to have some money on hand in October. Both of those games look awesome, and I am really excited for them. Heck, I still play Oblivion some and I've clocked in over 400 hours of game play on that (not the same character though). The only thing that hasn't been collecting dust lately has been the 360. My PSP is more than likely dead from not playing it for so long. I should actually plug it in to charge it as I still have a couple games for it that I didn't finish :( My DS is probably in the same boat. Isn't it sad that I had to buy an ugly pink DS just so my husband wouldn't take it to work with him? lol When my oldest daughter gets old enough to play video games I'll probably give it to her, she would love to play Nintendogs :) I don't think the Wii or PS2 have been turned on in the past 2 months even. I don't own a PS3 yet, as there honestly aren't any games for it that I want. Final Fantasy 13 MIGHT have been worth looking into one for, but now it is coming out for the Xbox 360 as well, so what's the point? All the best shooters and RPG's are coming to the 360, and I'm quickly seeing the only reason to buy a PS3 for is a Blu-ray player.

I think I am almost done typing. Just one last little thing. My hubby is really enjoying his job. He is pretty much done with training and will be on commission next week. I was hoping he would get a really good discount, but he only gets 10% off. That will still help though as we buy more furniture for our house. I want to get captain beds for both of the girls. They are still in toddler sized beds that we converted their cribs into. Those beds will only be safe to age 5 or 50 pounds. I really love the idea of captain beds. Those are the kinds of beds that have built in drawers under the mattress, they are also known as "mate's beds" "trunk beds" "drawer beds" and probably lots of other names as well. The bedrooms are fairly small in this house and there isn't a whole lot of room for bedroom furniture, so that would solve some of the issue at least. Hubby has decided what kind of sectional he wants for the basement when we get around to remodeling it. He thinks I would love the Shiatsu style massage reclining theater seating. He is probably right too, it does sound like something most people would love.

Anyways, it is getting late, and these little girls are getting cranky enough they may have to go to bed early. Besides, my hands hurt from all this typing...

Still working my butt off

I don't have much to say really. Mainly tomorrow is hubby's first day at his new job. He bought some new clothes today, so he's got enough different outfits to last him 5 days without wearing the same thing twice. He'll be able to switch the shirts and pants around some without it being too obvious, but he will need more clothes soon. I can't tell if he's excited or not about tomorrow. He really hasn't been saying much about. The biggest indicator that he is nervous and excited about it is that he asked me like 5 times if his clothes looked okay. Hopefully it goes well for him.

I can't believe I'm almost done with week one of the P90X!! Tomorrow is either a rest day or "X stretch" We will be doing the X stretch as I am still pretty sore and the stretching would feel good. Today was the Kenpo X, and it was kinda awkward. It is all punching and kicking, but 'ol Tony Horton wasn't slowing down to explain the move before doing it. While they are all at the 10th rep, I'm still standing there like an idiot trying to figure out how I make my body do what it is supposed to. That whole punching while thrusting your coordinating hip forward just feels so unnatural and awkward to me. Hopefully I'll get it down a little bit better for next week.

That stupid Legs and Back from yesterday really made my butt sore. I can't figure out which exercise did it, but my ass feels like someone beat me with a baseball bat. I can't believe how sore that left me. It hurts to sit down, and going up or down stairs is a real killer.

I was so excited last post, I had lost 1.5 pounds that day...yeah, I gained it all back :( I have managed to not lose a single freaking pound this whole week!!! I would be totally pissed and upset if it weren't for the fact that my jeans are fitting better. I am thinking that I am actually building a little bit of muscle and that is outweighing the fat that I am burning (muscle does weigh more after all).

Yesterday I was pretty proud of myself that I was able to do two of the V-up, Pulse-up ab exercises. lol That sounds pretty pathetic really, but I couldn't do a single one during the previous Ab Ripper X workout. I also managed to do more of the other exercises. Yesterday was the third time doing the Ab Ripper X. The first time, I think I managed to get 5 sit ups. lol I really felt weak and wimpy after that, so I am amazed with my progress thus far. Hopefully be the end of the 90 days I'll be able to keep up with the people on the DVD...Hah! yeah, right ;)

Hubby wants to continue to do the program after finishing it, just to keep bulking up and to maintain. We will be done with the program the first week of December. I will stop doing it then, because we are planning on trying for another baby then (IF the job works out good). This is definitely NOT a program to do while pregnant or postpartum. If I get pregnant when planned, and everything goes good (namely that I live through the operation, as I seem to have a problem with hemorrhaging and trying to bleed to death) I will pick it up and start doing it again after healed from the surgery. I will most likely do other exercise that is really light for the first year, then do the P90X workout again after that. I won't exactly be able to have a 6 pack through all that, but I will be a hell of a lot thinner than I am now.

Anyways, it's time for bed. Big day tomorrow :)